Bye

I have 1 hour left to leave this place.then i m going to Dc,wait in the airport whole night,fly to Chicago in the morning,wait 7,5 hours in Chicago airport,and then fly to Turkey directly..It is going to be a really tiring trip for me.
For some reason,i am not happy..I m not excited about going back to Turkey for vacation,not excited to see my family,not excited to see friends,not excited to see anyone..I dont know why...I dont like here either..And i wouldnt want to stay here..But going to Turkey does not sound that good to me either..
Why?
Why am i lost this much?Why cant i feel belonged to somewhere?
Plus,i feel extremely shitty today..i couldnt buy a phone card,because i didnt have any money left in my visa card.

is it emptiness what i feel? No..not even emptiness..Something meaningful but also sth i cannot figure out what that meaning is..Life is passing by..And say: "Hi" to me..
But i cant hear,because i was wearing an ear protect in order to not get cold...